To love and let go.

Those first steps, we’ve been waiting for them, watching you getting closer and closer to autonomy. And then you are off and there's no stopping you. Suddenly your tiny hand wants nothing to do with mine and I imagine it’s like watching birds fly and suddenly sprouting wings. You are elated. Your whole face smiles with having finally joined a world of forward motion.

I miss you already. I try not to. Be here now, I tell myself, but I miss you already.

To love and let go. That line encapsulates this feeling a bit. The closest a human will ever feel to another being and we must slowly watch and learn to let them go.

You are four now and I watch you bravely meeting the world around you. You had your first swim lessons this summer and you smiled and waved as I watched from the sidelines. I wanted to cry. I’d been worried that you’d be too scared to go in without me, but you were ready. And maybe I was just scared to be left alone.