The Spiral Library
—
An organized collection of musings, inspiration, creation, questions, answers, thoughts, feelings, and more.
Poem №021
She emerged from her cocoon
And suddenly she could fly
And all she wanted were wildflowers
And the wind beneath her wings
And everything else turned to dust
And she was free at last
Poem №020
The path that leads
To the lake of the clouds
Is full of sticks and stones
Lined by aspen young and old
The wind moves through the forest
Like waves on an ocean of pine trees
My only companion
The sound of my own footsteps
On the same earth I walked as a child
We used to sit on stumps
Along the edge
Taking breaks to catch our breath
Dad would feed us trail mix
Eyes closed we’d try to guess
What morsel he’d fed us
He told us the same stories
All along the way
To keep our tired feet moving
Bear claws on a tree
Our picture rock
The old mine
Chapters in our made-up book
If I close my eyes
Deep breath in
It’s like I’m there again.
Poem №019
The rain here smells like
Dust and childhood
And sagebrush.
The past whispers
In the breeze
And I’m there again.
The mountain child
Dirt on her soles
Wind in her hair
Wild and free
And wide open
To awe and wonder.
Poem №018
Please understand
I tried to free you
From your suffering
I really did
With every smile
Each apology for the things
You said I did
In every elaborate gift
That was never enough
In all the ways I tried to be
What I thought
You thought perfect was
I tried to love you
Into loving yourself
But it turns out
That’s not how it works
And ultimately
To be anything for you
I’d first have to save
The only life I could save
I’d have to learn
To love myself
The way I tried so hard
To love you
Unconditionally
And with all my heart and soul.
Poem №017
We took flight
And from way up high
We could see far and wide
And all across the earth
People built homes
Out of sticks and stones
And they searched
For safety and belonging
And some prayed for peace
And each one tried their best
With what they had
And even when
It wasn’t perfect
They began again
And eventually
All the tiny homes
And the flesh and bones
Would turn to dust
And all that would remain
Was the love they gave
From the stardust
Of their hearts
As they tried to put
A world together
Poem №016
My heart wants to be known
My voice wants to be heard
There's a place inside
That longs for connection.
I arrive at the blank page
In a daily practice
Of meeting and hearing myself.
And the words spill free
And there she is
And she is wise
And she is tender
And she is alive with light
And she has magic in her bones
And still she is afraid
Every time she risks
Being seen
Being heard
Being known.
But she is also courageous
And brilliant
And brave
And she is learning to trust herself
And she is coming to know
The strength in her softness
And the power in heart.
And so she returns
Again and again
Day after day
Risking rejection
Finally ready for
Deep connection
Finally ready to be fully seen
Whole and free
Risking her heart wide open
No longer willing
To edit her brilliance.
Poem №015
It’s all just a series
Of departures and arrivals.
One after another
We take flight
Hoping at some point
To land in a place
That feels like safety
Like freedom
Like magic
Like home.
Poem №014
You were fine
You said
Until you weren’t
And everything
You held inside
Came pouring out
And finally
You were honest
And the truth
Set you free
Poem №013
Bones ache, deep heart wound
Portal opens to relief
But first, you must feel
Poem №012
We are walking
The unknown path.
Reaching toward
A bigger dream.
We find our way
Through feeling.
Our destination
is not yet known.
It’s a place,
a world,
a humanity
That has yet
To exist this way.
Though it’s sometimes
hard to tell
And easy to forget
We don’t walk this path alone.
Beyond the veil of fog
That lines this unknown path
Are the faces of all those
Who walked this way before.
Those who dared to believe
In the bigger dream.
They call us forward now
Urging us to trust
In the place we have yet to know.
The place that we’ll call home.
Poem №011
“Busy” happens and
I lose myself
In the tidal wave of
Too much to do
And not enough time.
The only way back is
Through a courageous act
Of resistance.
Dare to stop
Stand still
Deep breath
Lay down
Remember what’s real.
Here and now.
Same as always.
“Busy” was always
Just an illusion.
Poem №010
I’m going back
to the place we first called home.
I’m going back
to find what was lost.
I’m going back
to scoop her up.
I’m going back
to hold her close.
I’m going back
to remind her I never really left.
I’m going back
to set us free.
I’m going back
to the wild.
Poem №009
She moved so fast
A bolt of lightning
I couldn’t understand.
I hid you deep
To numb the pain
And there you stayed.
Decades later
You’re crying out:
Bring me home again.
Poem №008
Today I am...
Full of a heaviness
Made of a thousand
Questions
And the rawness of
Grief.
They found
A tiny bird’s egg
Abandoned in a nest
At the base
Of a thorn bush.
She cried
For the life
Caught in the shell.
She cried
For the mother
Who left.
And she cried
For the part in her
That saw itself
In both.
Poem №007
We drove to the seashore
and spent the day playing in the sand.
We stayed until the sun went down
and drove home past the wildflowers.
They fell asleep in the backseat.
Sun-kissed cheeks, full hearts.
Happy, grateful, more please
Poem №006
When I am soft
Squishy
Open raw
I am movable
Adaptable
Responsive
Connected.
When I am hard
Armored
Defensive
I am rigid
Stuck
Reactive
Disconnected.
Sort is vulnerable
Heart wide open
Feel it all.
Hard is separate
False control
Numb to truth.
Soft is love.
Hard is fear.
They taught us to fear
But we were made to love
Made of love.
Love is soft
Soft is strong
Stronger than fear
I am soft.
Poem №005
Tender heart feeling
You care so much it hurts let
It break you open
Poem №004
It wasn’t easy
And I wasn’t sure
And I didn’t know
Which way to go.
But something deep
Below the fear
Led me toward
A softer way.
Poem №003
It’s painful
To be reminded
That I could lose
The flesh and bone
Of you
In an unforgiving
Unimaginable
Instant.
That all of this
Is fleeting.
That one day
My arms could reach
For the comfort of you
And find only
Empty space
Where you once lay
Soft and full
My whole world
Stretched out
Beside me.
It isn’t fair
That love requires
Facing
The most
Unimaginable
Heartbreak.
To love
Heart wide-open
Is to give
The wholeness of self
To what could be,
Will be,
Lost.
So, I look into you
Now
In this fleeting
Present moment
Hanging by a thread
In mid-air
Heart wide-open
And I find
The place
In you
Beyond flesh and bone
And there
I plant my love
In the space
That never ends.
And I pray
That when we lose
The flesh and bone
Of us
That the seed
Of our love
Will carry on
In the infinity
Of space
That exists
Beyond.
Poem №002
I found you
in a desert flower
made of paper and paint
high up in the blue sky.
Upon a crumbling world
something deep in me
recognized something in you.
Your eyes
took me home.
Unconditional love
at first sight.
I had no idea
how far I’d fallen
until my heart
escaped my chest.
Entirely exposed
under the night sky.
We were written
in the stars
and grew up together.
Now we wake up
wrapped in one another.
And we’re growing up
all over again.
Heart companions.
A fairy tale
lived in layers.
“You find peace not by rearranging the circumstances of your life, but by realizing who you are at the deepest level.”
—
Eckhart Tolle